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TABLE FACE SMASH – Between the Games


The one where Sarah holds all the brain cells of Achievement Hunter. Gavin: Since Jeremy’s beard has come off, he’s lost his inhibition. Jeremy: That’s my limiter. Yeah. Gavin: His inhibitor has fallen off and now he is very punchy, axey, swipey. Trevor: You know what? This is how dusk started. Jeremy’s gonna be a voluntary dusk boy. Alfredo: Oh, Jesus. Jeremy: Axe into the Ikea table ball~ Gavin: Not a ball! (Both laughing) Alfredo: Noooargh. Trevor: Ooooh. (All of them excited) Gavin: Jesus. Gavin: These things are made of paper. Trevor: Golf club! (Crunch) Alfredo: Ooho. (Gavin laughs) Jeremy: Go ahead, Fredo. Finish it off… Ohp! Trevor: Hold on. (More crunching) Trevor: There we go. Jeremy: Man, these things are just not made of anything. Alfredo: They’re really not. Trevor: WOOO! Jeremy: Eeeo. Alfredo: Like a honeycomb design.
Trevor: Yeah, there’s a reason why these things are just five bucks at Ikea. Alfredo: They get the job done when you’re at college though. Yeah. Trevor: That’s what your old desk was made out of, hence the axe thing. Gavin: So do you think someone could put their head through THAT? Trevor: Yes. Jeremy: Yeah. Gavin: Jeremy, how much for you to nut a hole through the middle of that? (Knocks on the remains of table) Jeremy: What? (Gavin imitates knocking head through table) Jeremy: I would do it. Gavin: Do you think you can go all the way through? Jeremy: Maybe. I would cut up my face but I’d do it. Alfredo: Oooh. I mean. Jeremy: Like feel that, Gav.
Alfredo: That will take you some skin. (Gavin hums in agreement) Jeremy: Like that will hurt but it’d be funny. Gavin: What if we got you a little helmet? Jeremy: Then, absolutely I will. Gavin: We could put it against the wall and then you could just run. (Alfredo laughs) Jeremy: I wouldn’t even run. I’d just go here and I just go here and I’d just… (Gavin laughs) Gavin: That’d be awesome. Alfredo: Or hurt. Trevor: What happened to those Payday masks that we had? They could protect his whole face. He just goes in. Gavin: Yeah. Jack wears that one in flinchless. Jeremy: I’m all face though! (Laughter) Trevor: Hoho.
Gavin: Oh, yeah. There you go. Trevor: We can do it now! Jeremy: Oh God. Trevor: Fredo, the more pieces you make, the more we gotta clean. Gavin: So, if we take this off, then Jeremy could run straight through that. Trevor: Alright. Testing. Alfredo: Aww.
Gavin: Nooo. Trevor: Just a putt. (Putts Jeremy who grunts and then starts to giggle) (Jeremy knocks on the desk) Alfredo: Is there any kind of foam on the inside? Is it lined with foam? Jeremy: Yeah, it’s got some cushion. Gavin: I’m not sure you’ll make it through.
Jeremy: I don’t think I will either.
(Start to laugh nervously) Trevor: Don’t. I don’t know if you should do this, dude. Alfredo: No. Here comes a mild concussion. (Gavin laughing) Gavin: I mean it snapped pretty nicely over his knee. Jeremy: It’s gonna hurt really bad. Gavin: Do we need to pre-stress it from the underneath? Sarah: That’s what I’m saying. I think we should. Trevor: Oh, I will pre.
(Knocks on underneath of the desk with golf club)
Jeremy: No. No. (Giggling) Trevor: Pre-stressed. Trevor: Not a scratch. (Laughter) Jeremy: Alright. Gavin: Should I get it in slow mo? Sarah: Oooh. This is such a bad idea.
Jeremy: Yeah, I know. Trevor: It’s a terrible one.
Alfredo: Yikes. Don’t do this at home.
(General agreement) Trevor: This is how Rooster Teeth goes out of business. The liability. Jeremy: I just gotta make sure that when I hit it’s just head. That my head’s not going back. Alfredo: I don’t wanna break your nose.
Jeremy: I wanna hit there. Trevor: Jeremy, I need you to give verbal, like, what’s it called? –
Sarah: Consent?
Trevor: Consent that you wanna do this. Alfredo: I, Jeremy Dooley …
Jeremy: Alright, here we go. Gavin: Oh God.
Trevor: Saying he doesn’t have to do it is the peer pressure.
Alfredo: Oh, f*ck. Jeremy: Alright. I’m just gonna give it one go and I can’t guarantee how hard it’s gonna be because my brain will only let me do so much. Lindsay: Yeah. Like live. (Jeremy taking deep breaths) Jeremy: Doyjo!! (Bonk) (Laughter) (Repeat in slow mo) (More laughter) Gavin: Oh, shit. You put a dent in it. (Laughter)
Trevor: Oh, no.
Gavin: Oh my God. Alfredo: That f*cking war cry. (Imitates Jeremy) Jeremy: Let me do one more. Let me do one more. Trevor: Oh no Michael. No.
Lindsay: Yeah. Just turn around. Jeremy: Me and you, table. You killed my father. Prepare to die. (Grunting) (Laughter) (And again in slow mo) Lindsay: (disappointed mum voice) Jeremy. Trevor: That’s a yikes, dude.
Michael: Who’s driving him home? Gavin: That’s a hard yikes.
Michael: He’s gonna pass out. (Jeremy grunts) (Laughter) Alredo: Oh, shit.
Jeremy: I really wanted it! Michael: Keep going man. You’re almost there. (Everyone else saying NO) Michael: Yeah! They’re all quitting on you, Jeremy!
Gavin: To be fair, things do happen in threes. Jeremy: Things happen in threes.
Michael: Come on, let him have it. A waste of a table though. Alfredo: Face made holes.
Jeremy: Zen place. You are head. This is table.
Trevor: Pretend it’s not there. Jeremy: Head stronger than table. (Slow mo) (More grunting and bird noises from Gavin) Michael: Damn dude. You know what they say about four.
Lindsay: Oh damn. Michael: It’s because you gotta tighten the top of your mask.
Trevor: You know what Michael, you’re right, things come in fours. Sarah: Nooo. Stop.
Michael: You gotta tighten the top here. It’s loose and that’s why. What? He’s gotta break it! Michael: I didn’t tell him to do it, I’m just like…. (And headbutt #4) (Screams of NO) Trevor: He’s getting closer to the hard part.
Alfredo: Stop. Go in the middle! Michael: Want me to take over?
Trevor: Michael can finish it. Gavin: I mean it’s a tag team situation.
Michael: I got you. You’re looking a little red. Trevor: He is quite red.
Gavin: It’s like a perfect face. Michael: You’ve gotten real close to the edge.
Jeremy: Yeah, the edge is bad. Trevor: He’s using forehead, which is a wise move unless you wanna break a nose.
Jeremy: I really don’t wanna break a nose or a neck. (Hard Bonk) (Laughter) Trevor: I can see the backoff. (Slow mo) Trevor: His brain works too well.
Michael: That was all nose there. You really gotta go top of the head. Gavin: Jeremy was going like head down. You’re going face down. Michael: He’s got a rounder head than me. I don’t have the technique. What do you like… (Laughter) top of your head. How where you doing it? Jeremy: I was like… I never skip head day. (THUMP) (Ouch!) Alfredo: You’re getting closer to the edge.
Trevor: You’re getting so close to the edge.
Alfredo: Stop! Michael: That didn’t hurt as bad though. You’re right. Jeremy: Yeah. Michael: I almost broke my nose on the second one. Gavin: I just can’t wait for Michael’s head to pop through. Jeremy: Yeah, you’re getting to close to the edge there. Michael: But this is where the hole is! Up here, I gotta start all over! Jeremy: Yeah, but if you hit right here, it’ll still –
Michael: I gotta start all over.
Jeremy: No it’s not all over. (Bonk) Michael: That’s tough, man. I don’t know if I can do it. Trevor: You can do it. Michael: I don’t know that I can do it. If Jeremy couldn’t do it, who am I? (Bonk) (Slow mo) (More grunting from everyone) Jeremy: It looks so bad.
Trevor: What’s happening is his brain takes over right before impact and he stops. Michael: No there’s no stopping, Trevor.
Trevor: No, it’s ok. It’s a healthy thing, you wanna stop. Michael: It’s the top of your head thing.
Sarah: No. No, no, no Jeremy. Michael: He had some time to rest. The man knows what he is doing. Trevor: You can’t say the thing is impossible when Jeremy is in the room.
Michael: The second one was like, all here. Michael: How did this happen? (Sarah laughs)
Gavin: Well, they just went mental on the other one. (sigh) Trevor: It got dusky.
Gavin: It got real dusky. The oxygen went through the floor. Michael: You should have started closer to the center. (Bonk) Gavin: GOD.
Michael: Like that one didn’t do it. That was so hard! Trevor: God, dude. Michael: Lindsay, are you seeing this.
Trevor: She’s hearing it. Gavin: That’s gotta be it.
Sarah: You gotta give up dude. Michael: Jeremy, it’s not even bulging on the other side yet.
Lindsay: I can’t… Trevor: Lindsay left.
Michael: I say, save it for another day. Gavin: Restore the braincells. Michael: Your head will come back, the table won’t. Jeremy: Ohh, got such a headache.
Sarah: No duh, dipshit! Oh god, it’s so stupid. Jeremy: The pupils are the same, I am sure.
Michael: It’s fine.
Gavin: I don’t know how to do the concussion test but you look alright. Jeremy: My eyes aren’t moving and the pupils aren’t dialated. So, there we go, we are all good. Jeremy: I consented to what happened here and eh… Michael: I was proud of you just to see it. Jeremy: Clearly, nothing happened all here.
Gavin: There’s a whole head.
Michael: Yeah, that’s the kicker, if there was something cracking, I’d say go for it. Jeremy: If that was bulging a bit. But no. It’s just all … That’s just all (Knocks on it) Gavin: Alright, I gotta look at that last one in slow mo. That was…
Michael: The last one was imminence.

39 thoughts on “TABLE FACE SMASH – Between the Games

  1. Those tables might be made of cardboard but they can take a hit, only time I 've seen someone easily break one in one hit is on one of the really long table tops where you need the leg in the middle (which they took off) and then jumped onto it.

  2. Beardless Jeremy looks like that guy down the street from your childhood home that was a marine 20 years ago and never quite moved on

  3. Reminds me of rams butting heads,but instead they ran a table to joggle their brains for new ideas…and to inspire dare devil children everywhere around the world

  4. Charles Darwin was a person who said things people should heed.

    (Un)fortunately, AH doesn't and we get videos like this. Neat! 😀

  5. Jeremy, June '19: "I am going to put my head through this table."

    Jeremy, December '19: "IT TWO-ZERO TWO-ZERO TENNY TENNY"

  6. I was getting annoyed of them talking up the table thinking it was break away and he'd do it in one or two hits but I know see what all the hype was about

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